Importance of Ownership #1: Space

The Committee (that would be Me - oh okay then... and Twinkie as well), would like to address some confusion over the term 'ownership'. Granted, the word has a variety of meanings - but as the Matriarch of my house, I automatically own everything. And that includes not just material possessions, but also more intangible things, like space, and time, and of course, territory.

Now today let us discuss the concept of space. If you looked up the word 'space' in a thesaurus written for cats, you'd find: 'boxes', 'cupboards', and 'shelves'.

Its difficult to explain to 2-legged ones, the allure of enclosed cardboard. Judging from the expression on the face of my female human when she comes home with a new pair of shoes, I'd say that it compares closely to the anticipation of climbing into a box.

Boxes are Mine - exclusively. Although Twinkie is qualified for a certain degree of access, seeing as she's a member of the Committee.


A box. Mine

Now cupboards present a slightly different issue. My humans are apparently rather sensitive creatures when it comes to cupboards, especially the ones used for their garments. Taking up such luxurious enclosed spaces with these 'clothes' things is a habit that still eludes me. After years of close observation, I have concluded that clothes are necessary for human beings to hide the embarrassment at not being born with an adequate pelt of body hair. Poor things.

Therefore my issue is not with the clothes themselves - in fact they're very comfortable... to sleep and roll on - especially that silk and linen stuff. And handkerchiefs make good headgear.

But these clothes take up, let's say, a third of the available space? So there's no reason why I should not claim the remaining two-thirds - simple logic.

It took a while and some persistence before my humans were eventually made to come to the same conclusion. I used my infamous powers of persuasion on them: now learn my feline friends, learn the power of the "rollover", or the patented "Jellyroll" as I like to call it. This manoeuvre melts even the strongest human defences.

Jellyroll: Mission Accomplished
Neither Twinkie or that fool Monkey have mastered the art - and far be for me to enlighten them.

These things must be learned, gradually, through one's own experiences.

Therefore cupboard space is also mine - and I intend to keep it that way.

Tactic #1: 'I am a figment
of your imagination'

Tactic #2:
'Yes, can I help you?'